Well, here I am.
Graduated and waiting for my birthday to arrive in another two months.
Summer has been f-ing boring so far... I feel like I'm missing something or that I just need to do something... but what?
Sometimes I get this feeling that I can't draw at all. I mean wtf am I doing this webcomic for..? Sometimes maybe things are hopeless and that I should go towards a more "realistic" goal in life.
I guess I just feel pretty stupid these days... I can't think at all. There's so many things on my mind I can't think about it all and I end up thinking about nothing and going nowhere.
lol
I'm so screwed.. I haven't even applied to a college yet. I'm suppose to apply to FAU... but I do still plan to go to washington. -- grr. They make it sound so hopeless, that I'd die if I were to go off on my own. But, I won't be completely alone. I know a lot of people back there. But... when my parents ask "who's going to help you?" I can't say, cause they hate my friends. they want me to forget, and just start anew. And I'm on the verge of doing so.
But all through out senior year I've been complaining about how this year was the worst year of my life and what I'd do to redo it- Back at my school where I knew everybody. How am I supposed to forget? It's like I left something unfinished.. I mean, I've moved twice in my life before this one, but they didn't affect me so profoundly cause I only had five or three years to live there, plus I was young. But... at 17, you can't just pass it by and live like nothing happened. I remember... Even memories of my past two moves are starting to hurt me.
I guess this is the point, the point where the road splits. I can follow the road that i've been taking with my parents, or I can deviate from it and follow my own way for my reasons...
haha..
I seriously need to lie in bed and listen to Meech for a couple of hours. Then I have to call my friends....and.....tell them what? auughh... First things first. Music. I should visit PIF and the Wreckers site... although I did a few days ago.. no one was on.. Keoni told me about a forum they made... never had time to join. I'll go do that.
well thinking back... Artwise, I have improved a ton.... I guess I can't draw when I'm not thinking right... What others say shouldn't hurt me...
It's funny how weak I sound and feel. lol I sound so girly when I talk to myself like this. Pathetic... though I feel like the times comming when things will change. It's comming too soon, but also, too slow..
^^ I have no friends. My only friend moved up to Orlando..Tampa.. and We just moved down here to Boca.. West Palm Beach. He wasn't a awesome friend...... But hard to admit, he was a pretty big help.
OKay, back on my feet... I rented Cromarti Highschool from blockbuster yesterday- funniest thing I've seen in a long ass time. Also bought this Shaman king pack of cards that came with a two-show DVD. That card game was hella hard to understand compared to the other games I've played before- (Magic the gathering, Yugioh, Pokemon, Duel Masters) Magic was the best one though, yugi comes second.
.... thats all. ^^
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